Hebrews 5:11b

"... you have become dull of hearing."

I always had ear problems when I was a young boy. Infections were a common occurrence for me. I've been a fairly healthy man since my childhood years, so I haven't experienced very much physical pain in my lifetime (perhaps my day will one day come), but of the few ailments I have endured few rival the pain of an inner ear infection. It's excruciating. It's also amazing how the wonder of an antibiotic can do its work so quickly and aggressively. Layer the scare tissue from those infections on top of my foolish decisions to play drums in loud bands without any ear protection and I have the perfect combination burrito for progressive and enduring loss of hearing. I'll never forget the words of a doctor after peering into my ears with his magnification instrument while I was still a young boy, 'I think you're going to have hearing problems when you're older'.

That's the physical side of my hearing, but the mental and spiritual side of my hearing should not be diminishing with age, but improving with age. It should be more refined, picking up on those high pitched tones of error and falsehood, and those low resonating tones of deceit and entrapment. I do notice that existential improvement in my senses, and for that I'm grateful for it is no doubt the presence of the Spirit and slow but sure victory over long, fought battles to mortify sin. But in order to enhance my awareness toward the spiritual (which constantly surrounds me), I need to feed on much more than simple milk. My nutritional intake has got to be well rounded, balanced and free from non-essential calories. When my senses are dulled, then all I can stomach is easy to digest foods. But when I'm healthier and stronger, then I ought to feeding on meatier meals.

The first time I really heard the Word of God expositionally and exegetically preached, my mind was turned to mush. I couldn't believe that the Bible was so rich and deep. It quickly dawned on me that I was simply sucking on the nipple of a bottle filled with cream all that while. That's all that tasted good to me because that's all I knew. But when solid foods were fed to me I suddenly found my taste buds, my pallet sparked to enjoy the richness of the banqueting table. Now I find myself satiated with the horn of plenty and hungering for the hunger. I'm not sure how I regain that impulse, except that perhaps I need to change the menu. A chef-friend of mine once told me that the most important ingredient in any recipe is hunger.

My prayer is that God would revitalize my tongue and cause me to experience and know new and different tastes I've never known before. No more satisfaction from simply eating to stay full and avoid hunger, but now I want to eat from the bread of life in order that I might know the fullness of God's glory and then myself glory in that.

'God, I want to hear again.'